Posts Tagged ‘mediation’

Welcome to my website!

My mission is to carry the message that there is a better way to look at, and respond to, conflict.  During the past 27 years, I have successfully mediated thousands of disputes and developed expertise in resolving personal and professional relationship conflicts.  Today, my goal is to provide strategic conflict management and creative relationship interventions to married and divorcing couples, estranged families, business partners, communities, and co-workers.

Much of my current mediation practice centers on my work with David Spofford and the network of Florida Mediators we brought together at A Friendly Divorce. In addition to mediation, at A Friendly Divorce, we also provide document preparation services so that the couples we work with can have a one-stop experience that ends with an uncontested divorce.  Additionally, David and I created a training program for professionals who want to launch or expand their practices to include pro-se/pre-suit divorce mediation.  This program is presented via streaming video through Mediate.com. Click or cut and paste this link http://www.mediate.com/university/pg29.cfm into your browser to learn more.

As a Primary Trainer with Mediation Training Group, I have taught mediation nationally and internationally to over thirteen  thousand professionals. Please consider Mediation Training Group’s offerings if you want to become a Florida Supreme Court Certified Mediator, acquire mediation skills to enhance your professional or personal life, or experience Continuing Mediator Education that is both entertaining and rich in content.  Check out the website to learn more about the other projects Susan Dubow and I are working on so that we can help bring mediation into the mainstream.

My book "The Professional Woman's Guide To Conflict Management" is available on Amazon or through the publisher.

Please stay tuned. I am interested in learning how I can help you improve your relationships using workplace agreements,  business partnership accords, dating contracts, prenuptial agreements, mediated divorces, and marriage pacts.  Additionally, I am intrigued with dialogue focused on aging in community, unstructured aging, legacy, and the final third of life.  Please accept this invitation to expand the conversation - email me your questions and comments.

Want more?  Visit my blogs - my blog and Elinor Robin on The Huffington Post for updates.

Course Correction: Shifting Mediation Paradigms

Last year I celebrated my 20th anniversary as a mediator.  Clearly, for me, mediation is not just a job or a business, its my life's work.  During the last twenty years I have studied conflict and conflict management (mediation being a process of conflict management) and I have mediated criminal, commercial, workplace, and divorce disputes.  Today, I believe that my most important work is as a mediation trainer and that my legacy will be my many students, who use mediation formally and informally, to make the world a better place.

As I look around at the current state of the mediation industry five things continue to annoy me.

1.    Professional mediators are trained in three different venues:  law schools, University based masters and PhD programs in dispute resolution, and 40-hour “Certification” programs offered by private providers.  Each group of students leaves training with different needs.  These needs are often unacknowledged and they remain unmet as  follow-up/future training is typically limited.

2.    There are limited employment opportunities for mediators and the majority of Mediators and Conflict Management Consultants are self employed.  So, training programs should (but most do not) include substantial marketing components.

3.    The “popular” training model - 40-hours of classroom training, followed by a short, on-site (often difficult to acquire) mentorship - was adopted in order to quickly train professionals coming into the profession with experience and knowledge from a related field.  This model has relegated mediation practice to a secondary position.  Re-positioning would require expanding and enhancing the training period and including a true practicum component that is supervised by a practitioner trained in mentoring.

4.    In today’s competitive marketplace branding is a critical component of any marketing plan.  This means that mediators (and other ADR professionals) need to have clear niche expertise.  So, basic training must be followed by advanced training in the niche area.

5.  In order to further the process of mediation and the profession of mediator we must have lobbyists that represent our concerns, on both the state and national levels, with legislatures and executive lawmakers.  And, we must have PR spokespeople who carry our message to the public.

What is Preventative Mediation?

Typically, we think of mediation as a process to help people in conflict.  In addition, mediation can be used to help parties negotiating a transaction or wanting to prevent a destructive family or business conflict.  Preventative Mediation can be used as follows:

1.  To create a pre-marital or pre-nuptial agreement, also known as a Marriage Charter.  A mediator can guide a couple's negotiations so that they can evaluate their expectations, consider a wide variety of options, and make choices about how they want their marriage to look.

2. To create an estate plan.  Often, in both traditional and blended families, there is a lack of clarity regarding the path a family should take to distribute its resources.  A mediator can guide a family’s negotiations so that an estate plan, that takes into account each person’s wants and needs, can be created.

3.  To create a business partner’s agreement, also known as a Partnership Accord.  A mediator can guide the negotiations of potential business partners so that they can evaluate their expectations, consider a wide variety of options, and make choices about how they will operate their business.

4.  To create a family agreement, also known as a Family Pact.  A mediator can guide the negotiations of family members seeking resolution with a wide variety of family issues such as curfews and budgets.

Contact me for more information about Preventative Mediation.

December 2009 – End Of The Year Update

How very fitting that my new website is going live just as we move from 2009 into 2010.   I love New Years Eve.  This is the time of year I feel compelled to assess where I am, where I want to go, and how I will get there.  This assessment process seems to lend itself to the possibility of a clean slate - a chance to begin again.

Personally, the theme for the first half of my 2009 was weddings.  Both my son and my niece got married and wedding related events kept us busy.  During the second half of 2009 my focus shifted homeward and David and I did some renovations.  It took us a long time to unpack afterwards but we are really enjoying the new look.

Professionally, as I look back on 2009 what stands out most are the wonderful people in my life.  I feel blessed by my friends and family who support me through life's ups and downs.  And, I am grateful for the wonderful professional support team David and I have working with us:  Irma, our delightful database manager; Joyce, our efficient bookkeeper; Kurtis, our wise accountant; Paul, our brilliant business coach; and Herb and Daniele, our webmasters, whose patience and commitment made this new website possible.  I am especially grateful for those who refer clients to A Friendly Divorce.  Not only are we pleased to have new business, we are honored that so many professionals think well enough of us to recommend our service.  That’s the best compliment ever.

In addition to my continued work with A Friendly Divorce and Mediation Training Group, I have two major goals for 2010.  I will finish both my "Launch Your Divorce Mediation Practice" manual and my book "Merrily Ever After: The Bride's Guide To Starting Your Marriage Off Right" this year   Please stay tuned.

Please know that I wish all of you a magnificent 2010 - may the New Year ahead bring you health, happiness, and abundance.

All the best,

Elinor

How Do Children React to Divorce? How Should a Parent Respond? An Outline Based on Maturity

Studies concerned with the effects of divorce on children are often inconsistent, conflicting, and confusing. It is simplistic and inaccurate to think of divorce as having uniform consequences for all children. While we may not be able to predict the long term effects of divorce on children, in the short term parents should be prepared for strong reactions. Grief, guilt, sadness, resentment, hostility, self-pity, frustration, confusion, a rejection of reality, and/or a fear of the future are all normal for children in families undergoing divorce.  One factor that will determine your child's response to the divorce is his developmental maturity. This article offers some guideline as to what a parent can expect at various life stages and how a parent should respond in order to ease the divorce transition.

Click here to go to Ezinearticles.com and view Elinor Robin’s complete article

Powered by WordPress | Designed by: Free MMORPG | Thanks to MMORPG List, VPS Hosting and Video Hosting